A Fascination with Sanitation or Sir Reginald cleans up

 Marvel's Marvelous Memories 1939

A typical day

What was all well and good on the surface, was not behind the scenes. Rose Lake Park had grown by leaps and bounds the last decade and cleaning up after so many new guest had been a daunting task for the small custodial department. By happenchance, Sir Reginald had his own family Sanitation Company in Baskingstoke, U.K.  How fortunate for the Park, and all of us remaining Founders.

 The Major General certainly wasn't going to pick up trash, "Oh Goodness me, Were these Peasant Folk  born in a barn? . Can they not clean up after themselves?" I shook my head,  "Let me explain, ONE. They are not "Peasant Folk". Its the American Farmers Collective from Parlusiana. TWO. Its their annual Company Picnic at Rose Lake. THREE. That is how farmer's dress these days. FOUR. I will admit that using a waste receptacle is foreign to them but, ..... "

A typical Plancovanian Farmer

"OHHH" The Major had a light bulb moment. "Why did you not say they were foreign?.... Bonjour, Ciao and Buenos Freitas to you" The MG was not grasping the situation at all... I was trying to stop the possibly embarrassing encounter, when Sir Reginald came storming by with a stack of papers in one hand and a very tired croissant in  the other. "What IS the meaning of THIS?" The croissant limped in his hand like an over ripe banana. I stifled a snicker, badly.  

"Sir Reginald," I began, "What is the meaning of ....?"  Oh, good Lord...The Major had started an impromptu concert with the farmers and I was always enlisted to sing chorus responses to his production numbers. I never remembered the words and my vocal technique was non-existent. This also distracted Sir Reggie, who seemed quite appalled, so I was able to dart into the Caverns Gift shop.  Just my luck, Doc Fishington was training New Cavern Tour Guides . I grabbed his arm. "I need help. You have two choices. ONE. Get to the MG before the third verse of , "I am a very Model of a Modern Major General" , or TWO. Find out what has Sir Reggie's knickers in a twist".  JF sighed, "Ponty, He's not wearing knickers..." 

The Newest In Knickers

"ARGGGG! I KNOW THAT! We all do. Someone buy the man a pair of proper American Undergarments...But, that's not what the issue is here. He needs something to do. Sarah Leigh is due any day and he is the worst expectant father in history. Let him take over the Custodial Department and he can start a Sanitation Company like he has in Basilchoke , Barkingwoke... Oh, good god ,whatever that place is called..."

"Basingstoke", I will speak to him. He seems like a pleasant enough fellow." JF, calmly set aside his papers. "Now where is he?" We peered outside to in front of the Ice Cream Parlour , where the Major had bought vanilla cones for all and was launching into "When I was Lad " from HMS Pinafore. Sir Reggie was happily licking away and joining in the chorus responses. At least HE knew the words....

JF casually approached Sir Reggie. "Good day ,sir. Pleasant morning for a refreshment isn't it? " JF could calmly charm a raging bull, if he needed too. I had watched in fascination many times, as he brought the MG down from the rafters, over some misconstrued slight. Sir Reggie turned mid lick, the ice cream now dripped into his beard. I tried really hard to keep a composed face. He seemed oblivious to the drip, which only made me laugh to myself even harder. JF through me a, "don't you dare say anything look". He was justified in doing so as my low humor had already concocted a naughty retort. Somehow I found restraint. I really do not know how...  

oh, dear me

Gentleman, may I have a word with you? Sir Reggie was all 

business now. JF, pointed the way. "Certainly, the Park administration building has our offices. Major Wolf, will you be accompanying us?" The farmers had begun to disburse with the free ice cream, so it appeared the impromptu program had ended. The Major twisted his mustache. "What's this all about? I am a busy man. No time for undo fuss arounds. Sir Reginald, how may we assist you? "  Then he saw the limp croissant still in his hand. "Goodness me ,what in heavens name is THAT? I apologize if we have interrupted your breakfast. I daresay, its a rather unappetizing thing . Wherein did you find it? I would be most embarrassed, because no one here likes anything with a soggy bottom."

Sir Reggie looked as only an educated Englishman could look, with 

an unamused glare. JF always knew when to step in. "Major Wolf, Sir Reginald has here, I believe, a proposition for us. We are in desperate need of a better Custodial department. It so happens his Family's Company is Transportation and Sanitation. Not only do they clean up, but they can tell us where to put it." I ALWAYS amazed me how JF could deliver a zinger and keep a perfectly a straight face. It caught Sir Reggie off guard. "But how did YOU know? I have the proposal right here. JF smiled , "It is MY job to know things. To anticipate problems ,if you will. We are in desperate need of your services and I  would hope you would share your talents with us. We are but novices at this whole Amusement Park business and can always use someone with your expertise and knowledge. Teach us, Sir Reginald , we are but eager pupils" That speech even had the Major at a lose for words and that never happens.

 We all watched for Sir Reggie's reaction. He broke into the biggest smile and his gruff demeanor passed. "Well, well, Gentleman, I may have misjudged you. Not only will I take on that project , in which you desperately need assistance, but see here this inferior product." He held up what was left of the croissant. "Purchased in the adjacent village, this is not quality at all. Even the French would be appalled. Well, of course they are appalled at everything not French . But I digress, I propose to finance a new Bakery for Rose Lake Park, I have been I contact with a pastry Chef ,well know in Europe, but with tensions arising there, wishes to relocate to America. He can bake these and much more, including an old family recipe for proper English scones." 

A typical English Scone with clotted cream

 "Well,  I think its a splendid idea" The Major had always loved pastries. "I have missed the scones I enjoyed back in London. There was this one time at I was at the Savoy , we in rehearsal for Iolanthe, I think..." JF cut him off before the story became a monologue, " Thank you, Sir Reggie , We shall deliver your proposal to our Board of Directors. I see no reason they would not accept it" "But you haven't read it?" Sir Reggie was a bit confused. " I put in my oar, "Oh, reading is so overrated."  JF shot a withering glance in my direction. "What the Professor means is, he rather have a presentation, if you will. Are you available tomorrow ,say one o'clock?  We will provide a late luncheon."

So it seems, we would get a new bakery at the Park and the means to clean up after. Oh, and a free luncheon. One can never pass up a free luncheon. But, I must remind myself to arrive early, as the Major will attempt to manhandle all the fresh fruit that is provided, I prefer my peach fuzz untouched.....